Mental illness makes things damn lonely

There’s so many inspiring blogs that I see on here every day. People struggling with different things, in particular, mental health issues, and talking about it, sharing their experiences with everybody. It’s such a weirdly uplifting thing to see. I don’t mean I enjoy watching people struggle, or be in pain, or anything. I’m not sadistic! I just mean it’s so very easy when you are suffering with a mental illness to feel like you are the only one in the world feeling like that. Even though it’s painfully obvious you’re not, conditions such as OCD and depression try their very best to isolate you from everyone and everything around you. And suddenly you find yourself in an extremely lonely place.

Right now I’m feeling so far into that dark horrible place. My OCD is at an all time high and it’s causing me to feel so out of control, so miserable. I can see what it’s doing to me and those around me. It’s like I’m watching myself from the outside, banging on the windows screaming at the crazy person inside, begging them to stop. I’m trying to figure out how to get back some of that lost control, but it’s difficult, understandably.

On a brighter note..! I would absolutely love to find some lovely people on here to talk to, or to get to know a little more. I always find that a problem shared is a problem halved… And if there’s any chance of beating my demons, or helping someone else’s with theirs, then that’s too good an opportunity to miss. Right?

Please let me know if any of you wonderful people are interested. Just to chat, on here or elsewhere. It would make me so stupidly happy to get to know some of you a bit more, and to feel a little less alone. Let me know 🙂

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Time to Talk Day: breaking down stigmatisation around mental health

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So today was interesting. How did you guys spend it?

The Time to Change charity is something I hold close to my heart, and they do awesome and utterly inspiring stuff. There still exists a massive ignorance and stigmatisation surrounding mental health and this needs to change. And of course, what better way to start than by doing your own little bit, at home.

I’ve had a letter sitting and waiting on my laptop for a good few months now. It’s addressed to my sister, and it basically explains everything about how I’ve been feeling, and struggling, recently. My sister is a wonderful person and I love her very much, but due to whatever reason, I feel like we’ve drifted very far apart over the last year and it makes me incredibly sad. I’ve missed her, lots. And when I’m having down weeks, like at the minute, I end up missing her even more.

So today I thought, well, today’s a good excuse to just take a deep breath, feel confident, and send her that letter. And I did. I felt nervous and sick and horrible but, I did it. And I feel so much better as a result.

Her reaction was something I was quite worried about… But everything turned out okay. The worry was for nothing. She still loves me and is my big sister at the end of the day.

I hope to whoevers reading this, that you know there will always be somebody you can turn to during your hour of need. It might be someone you least expect. But never be afraid to ask for help, we all need a bit of it sometimes. 🙂

Goodnight, A xxx